Add butter, egg yolks and sugar to a non-reactive small saucepan on medium heat. Also add lemon zest, juice and lemon zest. Stirring constantly, cook mixture until it begins to simmer, and thickens, about 8-12 minutes. Pour the mixture into a fine-mesh sieve over a bowl. Use a wooden spoon or spatula to push it through. Cover the top of curd with plastic wrap and chill until it is chilled.
Pre-heat the oven to 175 degrees Celsius (350 degrees F) for cakes. Grease 3 8-inch cake pans lightly and line them with parchment paper.
Place the coconut flakes in a food processor, or blend them until they are finely chopped. Set aside.
In a large bowl, combine the cake flour, baking soda, salt and nutmeg.
In a large bowl, combine butter, oil and sugar with an electric mixer. Beat until fluffy and light, about 3 to 4 min. Mix sourcream, lemon juice and vanilla until well combined. Mix in half of the flour mixture. Mix in coconut milk until combined. Mix in the remaining flour mixture.
Combine egg whites with cream of tartar in a clean, separate bowl. Beat egg whites at medium speed with clean beaters until stiff peaks are formed, approximately 5 minutes. Fold 1/3 of the mixture of egg whites into the batter until there are no white streaks left. Fold in the remaining egg white mixture until there are no white streaks left. Divide batter equally between the three prepared cake pans.
Bake in a preheated oven for 20-25 minutes, or until the tops of the cakes spring back lightly when touched. Allow the cakes to cool for 20 minutes in their pans before transferring them to a rack to finish cooling.
Cut cold butter into pieces of 1/2 inch. Place into a bowl. Beat butter on low speed with an electric mixer. Beat butter for about 2 minutes, increasing the speed of your mixer. Add cold cream cheese and beat at medium-high speeds until smooth and well combined. This should take about 3 minutes. Beat in confectioner's powder until well combined. Mix in the vanilla, lemon zest and salt. Add remaining confectioner's Sugar, 1 cup at time, and beat well after each addition. Add 1 tablespoon of cold coconut milk to the mixture and continue beating on medium speed for 2 to 3 more minutes. Place the frosting in the refrigerator for 10 minutes or until it becomes easier to spread on the cake layers.
Place one layer of cake on a serving plate or cake plate. Spread a thin cream cheese frosting on top of the cake. Pipe a ring around the edge of the cake. Place 2 tablespoons lemon curd into the middle of the frosting ring and smooth it out to form an even layer. Repeat the frosting and filling process by stacking another cake layer onto the first. Once the final cake layer has been stacked, use a thin frosting layer to cover the top and sides. Press the coconut flakes on the sides of cake with your hands. You can drizzle or swirl some extra lemon curd on top if you wish. Place the cake in the refrigerator to chill for 30 minutes.